2011

I am always in such a hurry to make plans for the New Year ahead.  I thought it was time to sit down and reflect on my accomplishments from the last year.  We are not always comfortable giving ourselves a pat on the back.  But doing so can be just the boost we need to feel ready to take on a new year, and new goals.

So, in the past year I have done quite a few things, most notably:

1.  Gave birth to my daughter
2.  Gave a fantastic Pirate Party for my son
3.  Embarked on a course
4.  Developed a more regular meditation and prayer practice
5.  Made some significant changes to our diet---for our health
6.  Lost some of the baby weight!
7.  Tried quite a few new foods and recipes (see the rest of this blog!)
8.  Tried out some great new craft projects including nappies, hot water bottle covers and embroidery

As I reflect on each of these in my journal I can pull out how I accomplished it, why I did it, and use these insights in making new goals.  More on those plans later!  But I can also look back to my goals from the last year.  Did I accomplish any of them?  Why or why not?  Did I actually spend time on them or other stuff?  How can I create goals which more accurately reflect me and my needs?  Do I need to change my goals to make them fit into my lifestyle or do I find ways to motivate myself to achieve more?  Lots to think about!

Paper Towel and Disposable Wipes challenge!

I am an addict.  In the last few years and especially the last few months I have become addicted to using baby wipes throughout the house.  I use them to wipe sticky fingers, wipe messy tables, spot clean the floor and walls, and even wash myself if I am in a hurry.

Now one of the ironic things about my addiction is that I wouldn't actually use baby wipes on my son.  I used reusable wipes with a special solution made from essential oils for nappy changing.  I did use baby wipes when out in public with his cloth nappies most of the time for convenience.  I usually used baby flannels to clean him up after meals.  I occasionally bought natural eco- and baby- friendly wipes when I could afford them.  Or just ordinary wipes on sale.  But it is really since my son has been potty trained that I have become wipes mad.  Maybe I am living a busier lifestyle trying to cram in work, childcare and domestic chores...but I want to give up my addiction.  I feel that it isn't great for the environment to use disposable products or ones full of chemicals (like formaldehyde!).  And it isn't great on my wallet either.

I actually haven't been buying paper towels in the last couple of months because I have been cutting back on unnecessary expenses.  I have a number of packets of wipes around--probably in every room and in the car!  Thanks to my recent trip to Costco. 

So I am setting myself a challenge before baby comes along.  For the month of April, I am going to hide the wipes.  I will leave the ones in the car because they are so convenient.  I will not buy paper towels or wipes.  I will get out the flannels, baby flannels, dusters, and cut up some old towels to make some more cleaning cloths.

Temptations again.

I am discovering just how much mood can affect my shopping.  I have for the most part been able to follow my goals for this month regarding menu planning and spending less.  I have been cooking from the pantry shelves and the freezer and made some really lovely meals, too.  I have spent much less than half of my usual spend so far.

But yesterday I was having a rough day.  I had two different doctor appointments, it was pouring rain, and parking was terrible both times.  I was tired, hungry, nauseous, and generally fed up.  (Though the appointments themselves went really well).  I was so tempted to walk into a grocery store and just fill my cart with custard, cake, soup, breads, chicken, fresh fruit, cookies, tea, and ingredients to make lovely roast dinners and more cakes.

Fortunately I live miles from a grocery store, and so my budget was saved.  I did stop at the petrol station for some petrol.  I purchased a half price pack of cake and some sour sweets---the only thing I have found to help with pregnancy nausea. 

I arrived home and enjoyed my treats--though they would have been nicer with a cup of tea.  And I remembered back to the last time I bought things when I didn't intend to.  It was when I was having a really bad day and had to go to another hospital appointment.  I wrote about it a few weeks ago.  I didn't want to get out of bed that day.  And on the way to my appointment I told myself I would go to the shop, find something I could eat and drink and a magazine. 

So I either have to decide that my budget can handle this or I need to make sure I take time to do some cheaper relaxation and pleasure activities.  And since my budget can't handle this, meditation it is!  And I went to the library and grabbed five, yes five novels.  Nothing like a stack of pleasure to make you feel spoiled. 

Temptation

Just as soon as you resolve to do something, fate sends temptation your way.  So I decide I need to cut back on spending and then received five sale catalogues through the door.  Actually that wasn't so bad.  I can resist clothes from Lands End because they don't do maternity.  (But I am worried that if Cox & Cox are selling things cheaply does that mean they won't stock them anymore??? Then I could miss out completely on some things I have been eyeing up).

But here was my dilemma for yesterday.  I phoned Ocado to make sure they don't renew my Delivery Pass.  The one which gives me unlimited delivery for a year, but costs £109 right now.  And the lady on the phone quite happily stopped the renewal.  But then she asked me if I wanted to have unlimited delivery for £3.99 per month.  This is the new deal.. I said, that I was cancelling because I was told I would have to pay £109.  She said, that was if I renewed automatically.  Now I am both confused why they would happily charge me so much when they have a deal on, but also I am not sure if I should sign up to the new programme. 

I said that I would need to think about it and now I can't find this offer on the website to think it through further.  The thing is, that if you cough up £50 on your credit card and then don't pay it off for several months, then you are not only not saving, but losing out big time.  So be strong.  Say no.  Walk away. 

Abundance

Although I would say that I am fairly good with money, I have found in the past when I try to be really strict with it I fail miserably.  I feel blessed with simple tastes and by this simple fact alone have managed to save for things when I needed them, because it sure wasn't my will power!

I think that just like dieting, setting strict limits on spending can have a negative effect on the psyche.  Sure, I have a few days of optimism, until I hit the grocery store and end up spending another £60 at the till.  My two areas of overspending are on groceries and stuff for the kids (dvds, toys, books).  And so to help me get into the right mindset for the next few months I am undertaking an exercise in abundance.

I am almost embarrassed to admit just how much food we already have in the house.  Especially when I know there are so many people out there who don't have much.  And to sit and complain seems a bit strange.  But I guess this may be the point of the exercise.  I am imagining my pantry now and I am going to list all of the things I can make with the ingredients on hand.

• Pancakes
• Bread
• Muffins---oatmeal, blueberry
• Cottage Pie
• Turkey meatloaf
• Turkey and Apple Sausages
• Pasta with pesto or tomato sauce
• 1/4 of a lamb in the freezer can make many dishes
• Chicken stir fry, and chicken soup from yesterday's roast chicken
• sukumawiki
• ugali, rice, semolina, barley, quinoa, bulghur wheat
• oatmeal
• Sushi
• Apple crumble
• Apple pie
• Cookies
• Cakes
• Clam chowder
• Frittatta
• Cheese sandwiches
• Bread and Butter Pudding
• Ice Cream Sundaes
• Cereal
• Potato Latkes
• Sweet Potato Oven chips
• Zege
• Bean Soups
• A number of vegetable dishes
• Kebab with flatbread and veg and meat
• Samosas

Now I won't make all of these right away and there are plenty more things I could add--especially if I dig to the bottom of my chest freezer.  But I do feel reassured that I can feed my family this week without stepping foot in a shop.  And probably next week too.  (Though I think I will venture out to buy milk, eggs, and onions when I run out).

Budgeting

We have created a New Year's Resolution for 2011 to pay off our credit card debts.

A quick look over our income and outgoings tells me that we will have to make a few drastic changes in order to achieve this goal.  At the moment this is roughly what we look like:

Income: 

• One full-time salary
• Plus overtime shifts on occasion
• One part-time salary, reduced a bit by long term illness
• Expecting some money back from a Payment Protection Insurance Claim

Outgoings:

• Food
• Petrol
• Utilities
• Council Tax
• Entertainment
• Child Maintenance
• Childcare
• (We housesit, so do not have rent or mortgage)

Upcoming expenses:

• MOT both cars next month
• Tax Disc for one car next month
• Haircut---would like one since it has been two years and I have split ends
• Tax disc for one car in June
• Items for new baby May onwards

Debts:

• Two Credit cards
• One overdraft
• Two outstanding loans

Oca, oca ocado, ocado, ocado

I have been having the most wonderful love affair with Ocado.  For over a year now I have had my groceries delivered to my door, by nice drivers, on time and what's more--with very few "substitutions."  (I have had two very poor experiences with Sainsburys deliveries and Tesco won't deliver to me because I live on a farm.  I am not a farmer, but that does not matter to them.)  Yes, I prefer our local farm shops and our meat and vegetable box delivery scheme, but they don't sell everything.  So needs must.

But they are too expensive, you say?  No, they have Tesco price match, Waitrose brand products, Ocado brand products, and deals all of the time.  Plus, when I go to the grocery store I end up putting tons in my trolley.  Online, I can take them out if I go over budget---much harder to do at the till with a toddler.  I have actually been able to reduce my grocery spending over the last year using ocado.

I want to pick out  my own stuff you say!  Well, I don't with a toddler.  Any trip to our Tesco Extra means 20 minutes in the toy aisle and then a frantic look around for what I want.  I can never remember what I want by then, and always leave disappointed. (I do like Tescos, but on my own, or with a lot of leisure time to explore the toys!)

Actually I am sometimes disappointed with the produce from ocado, but I do pop into other store occasionally.  (The produce is usually very good quality, but your avocados might not be as ripe as when you pick it out yourself. ) I also purchase cheap toilet paper elsewhere, because we need the really cheap stuff because we have very old drains which can't cope with puppies and teddy bears.

I don't want to pay for dellivery, you say!  Well, the nearest supermarket is 20 minutes away from me, and with the money I save by not putting extras in my trolley, I can afford the delivery.  Plus I have a trick.  They offer a annual delivery pass for about £110 or so.  I wait until they have an insanely good offer like last year when I got the delivery pass for £59.  You can then have as many deliveries as you like for the price. 


Having said all of that, I have to make some dramatic cuts to my spending and so I need to cancel my ocado for a few months.  My free delivery pass is expired.  And with a minimum spend of £40 per delivery I cannot manage this amount for a while.  I need to be extra frugal if I am going to meet my financial goals this year.  So it is farewell and not good-bye.  We will meet again one day.

Budget Cuts

So it is time to face up to the fact that we cannot manage to get out of debt or save up for the future without some really dramatic changes to our spending habits.  I believe that even a few months of cutting back will have its rewards. 

There isn't actually much we can do about some of our direct debits without cutting off the phone altogether.  Tempting sometimes, but I have only just started my blog and would like to keep broadband if possible.  So the areas we will target are food, petrol, and entertainment.

We are dividing our goal into monthly and three monthly segments We have already decided that we do not need to purchase the following for the next three months:  clothes, books, going out, and we will reduce eating out too.  That was the easy part!  We don't eat out much, we have enough clothes for a little while, and we have an inexpensive on demand tv service which gives us movies and tv at our convenience.  (We are considering cutting the tv service, but when the nation goes digital we will not have any tv whatsoever except for on demand---because we have an ancient aerial hanging off the house which will not pick up the digital signal.)

I would like some maternity clothes, but can manage on what I have and make a skirt if necessary.  And I insist that the family gets to eat from the major food groups each day.  I will have to compromise on our food choices, but all of our meat and eggs have to be at least free range as usual.  I am afraid fairtrade may go out the window for a month or two.  But we will do our best.

So here are a few of the ideas we have been discussing to try to cut our spending over the coming months.  I will let you know which ones worked for us when we have tried them out.

1. For January, cut on food bills by eating from the pantry and freezer, setting an extremely low budget, and using store reward vouchers to pay for food.  (I usually save them up for gifts and treats).
2. Pay money towards the credit card on the first of the month, so I cannot spend it.
3. Take out cash for food and petrol and make it last the month.  The amount will vary each month according to what is in our pantry already.
4. Declare one car off road to defer having to get a tax disc and MOT until we have saved up for it.  (This will work better if I am still off sick---but I hope to feel better soon).
5. If I do return to work, take up some freinds' offers of childcare to save some costs of the childminder.  (I would offer to barter, but it is illegal to provide childcare "for reward" in this country unless you are fully registered.)
6. Cut down on extra car trips to save petrol.
7. Other Half will do some overtime shifts and sign up to do some agency work on his spare weekends to bring in more money.
8. I will start doing some craft projects to sell at a craft fair in July.
9. We will gather items which are suitable for a car boot sale in the spring.  (Years worth of boys clothes come to mind---since I am having a girl this time.)

New Year's Resolutions 2011 Part 5: First Goal

Using my goal writing tips I will work on my first goal:

Creating a Family Meal Routine

1. We would like to develop a way to plan our menus and set times for our meals.  Initially we would like to try to have Breakfast at 6 am,  Snack at 10:00, Lunch at Noon, Snack at 3:00 pm, and Dinner at 6 pm.  I hope to have a workable routine in place by March.
2. Now   Our meals follow this schedule much of the time, but not all of the time.  Strengths  We have two adult cooks, I have time to menu plan and shop, we are motivated to try this, our work schedules are planned in advance which allows us to plan who will cook when, we have been experimenting with freezing meals, we have a number of quick meals in our repertoire  Weaknesses  Our 4 year-old often wakes at 5 am, although our work schedules are planned in advance they are not always convenient, our kitchen is cold and uncomfortable in winter (so we eat in the living room often), our son is becoming a picky eater lately---maybe because of haphazard meals in the living room with distractions, we have two very different eating traditions (the African way of eating 2 meals a day, on the floor, with a communal plate, with our hands, and the English style of eating 3 meals a day, at the table with a knife and fork), different food preferences (i.e. spicy vs. plain)  Research/Help  We could explore more quick recipes as well as meals we can freeze in advance
3. For this week, I will plan the menu on paper.  I will focus on quick and easy rather than cordon bleu because I would like to work on the times of meals.  Both adults are off work this week and so I hope this will make our task easier.
4. I plan to evaluate how we are doing on Thursday, when I will make the new menu and shopping list.  We will have groceries delivered next Friday as usual.

New Year's Resolutions 2011 Part 4: Goal Writing

Goal Writing

To really succeed in your goals, you need to take it step by step.  You will need some pen and paper.

1. First and foremost, you need to identify your goal.  What would it look like when you achieved it? How would you know?  When would you like to achieve it?
2. Next, identify where you are now.  List your weak areas, and anything which is blocking you from achieving your goal.  And also list your strengths.  What skills, resources, and experiences can you bring to the project?    Do you need to do any more research or recruit help?  This part needs care and consideration.  Otherwise you would have achieved your goal by now!
3. Break your goal into parts.  Create both weekly and monthly goals.
4. Review your progress regularly and adjust your mini goals if necessary.

New Year's Resolutions 2011 Part 2

The Other Half is out with the girls bowling today.  My 4 year old and I have been starting the cleaning.  Most people do spring cleaning, but I find the house is a bit of a mess.  There are bits of wrapping paper under the sofa, new toys everywhere, bowls of Bombay Mix getting stale...

And I have some free time to day dream about the year to come.  In many ways I feel so spoilt by living in the countryside and I am eager to take advantage of the wide open spaces, free blackberries and the apple trees here on the farm.  I make ambitious plans to become self-sufficient in vegetables, make loads of blackberry wine, preserves, and dried apples.  I plan to make all of my own bread or make 6 quilts, or finally hold a car boot sale.  And some of these things actually happen each year. 

It is a lovely feeling to have a fresh new year.  It will be what you make it.  Whether that is a year of losing the weight or developing a prayer life, exploring new places or learning a new skill.  It is full of potential and therefore quite exciting.

As I have said before, I often set myself a few too many tasks.  Many of which I do not achieve.  And so for this year we have chosen three resolutions.  And for today, everything seems possible.  One magical day when all your dreams are waiting for you to take the first step.

New Year's Resolutions 2011 Part 3

I have decided to work on three major goals for this year.  Two of them are family goals and one of them is more personal.

They are:

Create a routine around family meals

I work a regular schedule and my Other Half works shift work.  He is also African, and while I am sure there are millions of Africans who embrace routine, the one I live with is the laid back, eat dinner at 3 or 7 or 10 pm because "routine" is a foreign word kind of guy.  This doesn't quite suit the rest of us, and so we will attempt to schedule our meals from now on. 

Pay off our credit card debt

The word "debt" has always been a scary word and I have avoided it like the plague.  Until I was out of work for over a year.  Even then we managed very carefully until I got a job.  Then a few months into my job, wham!  A huge car repair bill, then new glasses, a few more expenses and we have never recovered. 

Cultivate joy in every day

I have days when I get frustrated that I am not living my dream of white picket fences and I really wish I could be a stay at home mother/domestic goddess.  Well with my inability to keep a neat house and our current finances these dreams are not going to happen.  But I realise I can take charge and still enjoy every day.  I can still bake cookies and make quilts if I stop moaning and start doing.  At least I hope so.  And bubble bath does not cost the Earth!

New Year's Resolutions 2011 Part 1

I have been writing in my journal for many years now.  I always liked this time of year when I would fill my journal with my hopes and resolutions for the years ahead.  I would list all sorts of goals from eating well and exercise, to making 12 quilts, reading 52 books, traveling to 3 new places...my lists would take pages to write and I began each year with such anticipation for the wonderful things to come. 

Only, my resolutions would usually last less than a week.  (I often managed the 52 books).  But I created way too many goals for myself without any real plans on how to carry them out.  I spent year after year eating the same way, exercising (or not) the same way, and feeling bad about myself.  And so I decided to spend a few years refusing to create resolutions. 

The break has helped me in a few ways.  I have been focusing more on the everyday, appreciating the moment, and counting up my accomplishments.  I have been reading books on positive thinking and embracing the notion that I am doing the best I can at this moment in time.

I feel I am ready to make resolutions again and have asked my Other Half to join me in creating some family resolutions this year.  I would like to take the lessons I have learned into this next year. I would like to create goals which are achievable and really benefit my family.  So I have a plan......